Abram Sauer Online

10. October 2011

Original Patrick Howley American Spectator Story a LIttle Different

Filed under: Failure, Elsewhere, This Could be Longer — admin @ 11:18

The America Spectator story by editor Patrick Howley who “infiltrated” the Occupy DC protest has been reported with heavy edits. Comments such as “…in order to mock and undermine in the pages of The American Spectator” have been removed with no correction. The original, after the jump.

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8. June 2011

Tim Pawlenty in a Parking Lot

Filed under: Minnesota, Real America, Awesome, Elsewhere — admin @ 14:07

pawlenty-in-omaha.jpg

Right?!

12. January 2011

Sick Joke is Not a Joke: Haitian Day of ‘Fasting’

Filed under: Gaaaah!, Failure, Elsewhere, Advertising — admin @ 15:25

Yes, a day of fasting in Haiti. Fasting. In Haiti. There are jokes to be made but, I mean, what the fuck is wrong with you Franklin Graham?

28. December 2010

The Year in Abe Sauer

A list of important, funny, overlooked and/or popular things I wrote in 2010. In no particular order:

BP Stock,One Awl Reader, Both Winners Six Months Later - The Awl

Two Hours in Marinette: Lessons From a School Shooting - The Awl

Sarah Palin the TV Star Exposes Sarah Palin the Fake Hunter - The Awl

Sarah Palin’s Accidental Social Network - Esquire

If You Don’t Support Health Care Reform, You Don’t Support the Troops - The Awl

Target Doesn’t Support Gay Equality Because It Never Did - The Awl

After the Apology, Target’s Anti-gay giving Never Stopped  - The Awl

Gap Rebrands itself into Oblivion - Brandchannel

Dystopian Wisconsin: Who is Ron Johnson? - The Awl

Inside Ron Johnson’s Victory Party: Reason Concedes to Ron Johnson - The Awl


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16. December 2010

Two Hours in Marinette: Lessons From a School Shooting

Filed under: Wisconsin, Tricky, Real America, Elsewhere, Essays — admin @ 08:12

hengel.jpgThe November 29 school shooting incident in northern Wisconsin, at time of publication America’s latest, is being spun as a success of the post-Columbine system. A trained school staff and law enforcement levelheadedly defused a heavily armed student prepared to do the worst. But when police finally responded to the 911 call, more than two hours had passed since gunshots were fired. These gunshots were heard by many—although, apparently, not the on-duty police officer stationed at the school…

READ IT at The Awl.

6. December 2010

The Awl: The T-Shirt

Filed under: I need a new tag, Elsewhere, Ha Ha Ha — admin @ 12:51

I’m late to the part but yesterday The Awl imagined what a “The Awl” t-shirt might look like. But anyone with any real familiarity with the central nervous system of The Awl would know the below shirt is much more true to heart. Or, maybe this could be the version with STAFF printed on the back.

awl-tshirt.jpg

2. December 2010

Company Literally Kills Its Competition in Commercial

Filed under: Awesome, Elsewhere, Advertising — admin @ 09:02

I don’t even know where to begin in the number of ways local commercials are superior to snazzy high-priced national spots. For example, this wonderful piece of marketing below is probably more effective and memorable than ten Old Spice Guy ads.

22. November 2010

Deadspin Notes Pervert’s “Peephole Question” Re: Erin Andrews While Using Screeshot of Andrews Peephole Video

Filed under: Gaaaah!, Great! Now I have a Gawker Tag, Failure, Elsewhere — admin @ 14:06

What a difference a year makes:

“CBS Discusses “Serious Violation” Of Erin Andrews’ Privacy By Airing Video In Which Her Privacy Is Violated”

– July 21, 2009; Deadspin

deadspin-andrews-shot.jpg

– November 22, 2010; Deadspin

15. November 2010

How to Slaughter a Turkey

Filed under: Yummy, Wisconsin, Real America, Elsewhere, Essays — admin @ 15:48

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“I would like to say something nice about the killing a turkey. I would like to say that dragging the knife across the bird’s throat is an elegant, silky motion. But that is not true. The bird’s dies loud and messy. It gurgles and twists and makes it known it wants it all to stop.”

Read it all at Esquire… (additional photo after the jump)

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12. November 2010

Palin / Sauer 2012

Filed under: Elsewhere, Ha Ha Ha, Admin — admin @ 09:14

Abe is no better than Sarah Fucking Palin in that regard.

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