Abram Sauer Online

27. October 2010

GOP Green Stands for Money, not Earth

A trend in Wisconsin is far right tea party conservatives eschewing the traditional (patriotic?) red and stars for a green that suggests they are somehow progressive or, even more laughable, a friend of the environment. (Ron Johnson suggests that sun spots cause global warming.)

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Worst Costume Awards: His and Hers

Filed under: Gaaaah!, No No NO, Failure, Halloween — admin @ 11:45

And here are the worst his and hers costumes for Halloween 2010. If you find yourself wearing either of these (”one-eyed monster” / Twix bar), congratulations, you are a terrible human being. At least subtle racism, misguided politics, and outright bigotry prove that you care, at least a little, about the holiday. Unlike the below two people of whom one has to ask, “Why even bother?”

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26. October 2010

Why Even Bother with “Native American?”

Filed under: Gaaaah!, Failure, Halloween — admin @ 16:36

Bravo for using the respectful “Native American” instead of “Indian”…  I suppose.

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In Which Green Bay Women Save Brett Favre

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READ IT at Esquire.  After the jump, a modern Brett Favre scandal in one stupendous act.

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23. October 2010

“Uff Da”: Tim Pawlenty Welcomes Obama to Minnesota with “Minnesota Nice” Comedy Routine

Tim T-Paw Pawlenty, outgoing governor of Minnesota and GOP Presidential hopeful, found an old local news report background in a dumpster and decided to record a message for Obama’s visit to the People’s Republic of University of Minnesota. I cannot decide what my favorite part is, where the governor criticizes Obama for spending money, including the $2 billion in stimulus Minnesota gladly accepted or the “Minnesota Nice” passive aggression at the end.  What’s yours?!

Ladies and gentlemen, Tim will be here all week. Try the veal and remember to tip your waitresses.

21. October 2010

Red Dawn Remake Better than Expected

Filed under: Real America, Failure, Elsewhere, Advertising — admin @ 16:32

A new ad from the Responsible Citizens Against Government Waste.

18. October 2010

You and Your Crappy $15K Car

Filed under: Real America, Failure, This Could be Longer, Advertising — admin @ 07:38

VW and the Los Angeles Deutsch ad agency are mocking your pathetic little “fly-over state” dream of owning a VW Jetta.

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17. October 2010

Say Anything Blog Says Anything

Filed under: No No NO, Gaaaah!, Real America, Failure, Elsewhere, North Dakota — admin @ 15:19

Below are two recent screen-grabs from Rob Port’s Say Anything Blog, a cheerleader for tea party activism. Looks about what one would expect so many in that movement are really about.

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Of course, that’s not a question driven by racism at all. He’s just askin’, you know?!

14. October 2010

Tea Party Witches: Sean Duffy Joins O’Donnell

Filed under: Wisconsin, Gaaaah!, Tricky, Real America, Elsewhere, Advertising — admin @ 11:19

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Here is Sean Duffy mocking fellow tea party candidate Christine O’Donnell. Sean is the “Lumberjack” Candidate for Congress in Wisconsin’s 7th District. Just how lumberjack is he? After the jump… (more…)

13. October 2010

Rob Port is Fat

Filed under: Gaaaah!, Failure, Link Bait, Essays, North Dakota — admin @ 12:24

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Rob Port of North Dakota is fat. Yes, Rob Port, editor of the Say Anything blog. That Rob Port. Yes, he is really fat. Unsightly fat and obese. I mean, Rob Port is “he told his listeners they needed to cut pork spending and they started in his refrigerator” fat. Rob Port is “he posted a story about the Dubai port controversy and his readers thought they meant he was switching to Middle Eastern food” fat. Rob Port is “his parents Carol Port and Rollie Port worry about him dropping dead of heart disease” fat. Rob Port is “how does he even have sex with his wife Jessica” fat.  Rob Port. Fat.

Yes, that Rob Port. He’s fat. Rob Port is so fat.  And stupid.

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